Arkes Backs Buick Into Logic of Morals

THE OCTAGON, Amherst, Ma. –  Amherst College Police have confirmed that Professor Hadley Arkes’s 2009 Buick Enclave suffered minor damage last Tuesday when he inadvertently backed it into the logic of morals itself. According to the police report, Arkes was seen leaving The Octagon at 3:22 p.m., following his lecture for his signature course, “Political Obligations.” “His car was backing out just fine when, all of a sudden, its bumper smashed in and it stopped abruptly,” reported Steven Osman ’15. “Even though we’re only in the sixth week of the course, it was pretty clear to me that he must have accidentally come upon the necessary truth that all men are created equal.”

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