Do you remember where you were the first time you walked on the quad? Try to think back. You were on the quad.
Yes, oh yes. Remember how you felt when you first stepped foot onto this earthly paradise, this ice kingdom of the liberal arts? In that moment, you knew Pomona could never compare to the slick wonderland of Western Mass.
Admitted students weekend was more than just an opportunity to get your feet wet. It was an opportunity to get your shoes wet, your socks wet, your hair wet, your pants wet, and your awesome (free!) Amherst drawstring bag utterly drenched. You come from 49 states, 112 countries, and now you have all been submerged in the frigid, invigorating hailstorm of higher education.
As you walked around the bucolic, frozen quad, you saw your future peers: people from around the world to whom you already felt connected. Finally, you could see yourself reflected in others, and others reflected in the pool of melted slush collecting outside of Merrill.
Journeying past Merrill, the power of the Amherst education struck you, as did the sign for Keefe Campus Center untethered in the 35 miles-per-hour wind. While the torrential downpour washed away the ink on your program of events, you could feel the ignorance washing away from your entire being.
Finally, you saw students and professors alike running for shelter in the deluge. Knowledge! A refuge from the cold, hard tears of incomprehension! Students! On the same frozen field as their wise teachers! Amherst! Holding you close to its Frosty bosom!
Bundle up, nerds. It’s gonna be a cold four years. Whatever terras is being irradiented, it’s definitely not here.