10 Biblical Quotes that Perfectly Describe Saturdays For All You Boys Out There!


  • Right before you close the deal                                                                                            

    “Your breasts are like two fawns, like twin fawns of a gazelle that browse among the lilies” Song of Solomon 4:5

  • Walking into Lit w/ fam-squad
    “I have come to set the world on fire and I wish it were already burning!”Luke 12:49
  • When Dominoes is closed    

     “He said to Jacob, “Let me eat some of that red stuff, because I’m exhausted.” Genesis 25:30

  • When you steal alcohol from the party                                                                                     “A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.”Mark 14:51
  • When a young ~thot~ gets handsy

    “If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them intervenes to drag her husband clear of his opponent, and if she puts out her hand and catches hold of the man by his privates, you must cut off her hand and show her no mercy.” Deuteronomy 25:11

  • When u see an 8 in the lax suite

    “Then the angel of the LORD moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD, she lay down under him” Kings 22:21

  • When ACEM’s just don’t have the answer

    “No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the Assembly of God.” Deuteronomy 23:1

  • When it’s her time of the month n she wants to go back and cuddle

    “…the impurity of her monthly period will last seven days, and anyone who touches her will be unclean till evening” Levitcus 15:19

  • When the lord condemns u the next morning

    “…you made for yourself male idols and engaged in prostitution” Ezekiel 16:17

  • When a group of freshmen inevitably call you “old”

    “…as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you bald head! Go up, you bald head!” So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the Lord. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.” Kings 2:23

  • When you realize how soon you’re graduating

    “Give beer to those who are perishing, wine to those who are in anguish.” Proverbs 3:16

    *** and for the ladies!

  • When u walk into DKE!

    “She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.”Ezekiel 23:19

  • When you a wing-man for your lady friends

    “Look, I have two virgins both of them. Let me bring them out to you and you could do what you like with them.” Genesis 19:8

  • When you’re alone outside of Jenkins n realize that u ugly

    “Everything is meaningless.” Ecclesiastes 1:2