The Amherst Muck-Rake’s Top 10 Albums Of The Year

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By Josh Lewis ’16, Staff Writer

1. 1989, Taylor Swift. Guilty pleasure alert! It doesn’t remotely compare in musical depth to Uncle Dan’s Here I Am, which artfully combines a Kerouac-like individualism in his progressions with soul-searching lyrics. But… how can you not start singing along whenever “Style” comes on??

2. 1989, Taylor Swift. Had to put it on this list. It’s a guilty pleasure for sure, definitely not as sophisticated or powerful as The Broken Sofa’s Quiet Whisper. But boy do we do love blasting “Shake It Off” during meetings when discussing comments on our articles.

3. 1989, Taylor Swift. Uh oh, another guilty pleasure! It’s fun to listen to when you’re in a silly kind of mood, but don’t worry, I’ve spent much more time focused on the delicate cacophonies of Lady Pirate’s Take A Seat, which I suggest you listen to.

4. 1989, Taylor Swift. Guilty pleasure time! Definitely no actual artistic merit to this cute little album. But when I get emotionally exhausted from meticulously mapping out the morbid symbolism in the genius counterpoint of The Graverobbers’ Kitty Dead, I put it on and listen to a couple of songs.

5. 1989, Taylor Swift. Not gonna lie, this one’s kind of a guilty pleasure. When compared to the brilliant, touching, and deeply personal sound of The Memphis Grizzlies’ Basketball Songs, it comes off as childish. But you should listen to it just for pop culture literacy.

6. 1989, Taylor Swift. Oh no, not another guilty pleasure! This album is pretty bad and nobody should ever listen to it. Instead, study the elegant complexities of Anderson Cooper’s Justice.

7. 1989, Taylor Swift. Admittedly, this one is kind of a guilty pleasure. In fact, I wholly dislike this album and have only heard a few of its songs in public. Why listen to popular trash when you could immerse yourself in the wonderfully inspiring Miracle Soundtrack: Remastered?

8. 1989, Taylor Swift. All right, gonna let it all out: I really like this album. Just kidding. I do not like it, and it is deeply offensive rubbish. Do not buy this album. Instead, refresh your soul with Tony Marx’s delightful new album Follow Me Home.

9. 1989, Taylor Swift. Big-time guilty pleasure. Except for that I hate it, and if you read between the lines of “Welcome To New York,” I believe there are subtle digs at my family. But I haven’t ever listened to it so never mind, how would I even know that. There are much better, deeper musical pleasures to experience in The Tooth Fairy’s Righty-Tighty, Lefty-Loosey; Admiral Bennett’s Smart Investing; and The Juice-Juice Twins’ Edgar Allen NO.

10. Sorry guys, only listened to 9 albums this year! I’ll let you know if something else crosses my radar.

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