Psychology Major Who’s Definitely NOT An Alien Perfects Art of Human Behavior

Portrait of boy going college with friends in background

“I sure do like drinking copious amounts of alcohol at those socials and smoking that dank kush with my peers. Val sustenance is terrible and I’m very much upset at the fact temperatures are beginning to lower,” said John Smith ’17 before licking his own eyeballs and melting a passing squirrel with his saliva.