‘Motherfucker,’ Shouts Every Student Heading to Mail Room

'Jim Brassord, that bastard,' muttered every Amherst student

AMHERST, Ma. – “Oh, fuck this shit,” said every Amherst College student returning from winter vacation and attempting to access the college post office Sunday, upon discovering that the room housing all of their mail had been rendered wholly inaccessible for several days.  “We’re gone for a month and they have to close the post office this weekend?” asked Amherst junior Emily Liu ’14.  “I’ve got a month of mail, some of it possibly useful, and now is when I can’t get to it.”

At press time, the college had descended into chaos as students struggled to determine whether the post office would be closed until Sunday, January 20, or Monday, January 21, and on which date Friday occurred.

 

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